Merry Christmas!

What is the story you want your life to tell?

I am in the throes of early parenthood and over the last four years it has taken up all of my time and energy staying at home with my kids. I am putting my heart, soul and full attention in the season that I am in & I have absolutely no regrets. However, this question has been tapping at my soul lately and there is something stirring up inside me that I can’t quite put my finger on.

The seizure this fall pushed me forward to make some decisions that I have been on the fence about. I sought out the guidance of a childhood psychologist to learn how to best support Elliott & educate ourselves in the meantime. I will speak more on this at a later date, but with this new therapeutic addition, reassurance from the neurologist, and finding success in all his new medicine; I had an A-HA moment.

We are going to be ok & no season lasts forever. I feel confident with our progress and strong in both my mental and physical body.

Life has ebbs and flows, peaks and valleys and seasons of trials and triumphs. That’s the beautiful thing about being alive, it doesn’t always have to stay the same, or stay hard. Having both of these dichotomies is what makes life so whole and complete. It is what you grow and learn from. I want to take my lessons and bring them into new seasons, or pass any wisdom I have gained on to others.

Healing looks different for everyone. It can be a very quiet process, but what is important is that it happens. It’s important that we feel our way through healing. We don’t skirt the issue, avoid it, or ‘fake it til you make it.’ Pain, sorrow, happiness or hope are not meant to be carried forever. There is something very powerful about recognizing different life’s seasons and being able to let go of the hard and say thank you for what you have taught me.

I have found truth on the other side of lies. Vulnerability on the other side of fear. Empathy on the other side of pain

Joanna Gaines

All of this has lead me back to these questions: What kind of legacy do I want to leave? How do I want to live my life? How do I want my life to be perceived? What are passions and goals that I can begin to pursue? How can I be the best example for my kids?

For now, the current answer to those questions is to slow down and start taking notice. It is enjoying the equal parts chaos and simplicity that co-exist every day in my life.

I am learning that presence takes practice. Being present is taking inventory of some of these thoughts and questions I have swirling around my head. I believe that my passions can lead to a world of wonder and experiences that I could never plan for, or expect.

I am not in the season of being able to say yes to whatever adventure, career or volunteer opportunity comes my way, and that is ok. It doesn’t mean it won’t happen and when it does, I can be eager to spot it, be grateful for the new season, and able to say yes.

I am choosing to trust every piece of my story.

I believe that all the challenges that have happened to us will benefit and teach someone something, one day. I know that my passions and big dreams have never left me in the midst of dedicating my life to my kids while they are still so little. I will happily take in the small moments and see the beauty that exists in something as simple as baking multiple different types of Christmas cookies for Santa Clause (so he will have options of course 😉 I will choose gratitude, every single day, for the life that I have, the family I was born into, and the family I have created.

This is a wonderful day. I have never seen this one before

Maya Angelou

Don’t forget, nothing bad lasts forever and light will always overcome darkness. Always.

I hope that you, too, can slow down in this holiday season & new year and find the joy and love that exists all around you.

I want to wish you a very Merry Christmas from my family, to yours!