Setbacks

Saturday- September 24; 10:20AM.

My parents are in town, visiting. The men in the house are working on an entry way project which includes ripping up floors, laying tile and re-doing our half bath. Harper and Elliott were playing and got into a very typical sibling spat. Harper took Elliott’s toy, Elliott started crying.

I walked away to let them work it out, which is very standard in our house. Seconds later, when I turned around, Elliott was in an awkward position up against the wall simultaneously frozen & shaking out of control. I knew something was very wrong. I ran to pick him up and his body was rigid, his lips were blue, and he had a blank stare in his eyes that I pray to God I never have to witness again.

Where was my baby boy? What the hell was happening?

I started screaming and hitting his back and most of the next 10 minutes are a complete blur.

Elliott was having a seizure.

Thank God my mom was there because she knew exactly what to do. She took him from my arms, laid him on his side on the couch and waited. The seizure from start to finish was less than 30 seconds, although it felt like an eternity.

Within a few minutes I was on a hysterical call to his pediatrician who told me they could see him in the next 30 minutes, which felt faster than we would be seen if we took him straight to the ER. Nathan and I put him up in the car and drove to the doctor.

The doctor checked him out and confirmed that he had in fact had a seizure, but was ok now. Which was clear because he was acting completely normal as if nothing had happened. My mind still in complete shock…

The doctor told me she was going to put a call into the hospital for me to talk to his neurologist ASAP. That afternoon I spent 45 minutes on the phone with the on-call neurologist. She navigated my dozens of questions and prescribed us some anti-seizure meds to give to him while we come up with a plan of action in the coming weeks.

The neurologists’ initial thoughts are that his brain damage from birth caused his seizure. This seizure could be a one time incident, random, or epilepsy. The possibilities feel endless, in all the wrong ways. This seizure has opened the doors to a whole lot more questions, fears, unknowns and appointments.

The good news is that Elliott has responded well to the anti-seizure meds, we have an EEG scheduled this week, and a sedated MRI scheduled for next week. With those results we will have a better picture of what is happening inside his little body to make a game plan moving forward.

If you pray, pray. If you don’t, we could use positive thoughts and vibes. We certainly need the support of our community as we navigate this new obstacle. In the meantime, while we wait, we count our blessings and live minute by minute.

WHAT IF:

What if all this time, all this struggle has been leading to a beautiful chapter in your life? What if everything does work out, even if it doesn’t seem like it right now? What if who I’ve become is who I’ve needed all along? What if all this hard work leads to amazing things? What if you replaced negativity with optimism? Would your thoughts and behavior change too?

Tiffany Moule